The definition of style...
Posted by
Dain,
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
7:10 PM (Eastern)
Once upon a time, I read a remarkable article in Elle a few years ago. I hope I may copy it verbatim as I don't think I could put it as eloquently as this writer has: The truly stylish rarely change their clothes. Sure, they occasionally dip them in filtered water tinged with Italian baby shampoo before leaving them to dry in cedar airing cupboards, but there's none of that wear-it-only-once-a-week nonsense that many of us have clung to since high school.
Since that time, my objective each season has been to purchase a capsule wardobe—a set of five basic pieces that are sufficiently directional to put place me near the cutting-edge, but neutral enough to have a closet life of more than six months.
Frankly, it's not easy task, given my magpie tendencies. Yet, when I recall my sartorial exploits in the years before the conversion to capsuledom, I realize that I invariably wore a precious few items to death every season. My hunch is, that's the way most of us dress... the trick is to define your basic pieces proactively, not retroactively—and this requires a hardnosed reckoning of your body, your career, your life. I think this is the true philosophy behind "personal style". It's a difficult thing, to recognize the mechanics behind personal style, because much of what we see as "style" in magazines either comes from the designers themselves, or from the celebrities who dress up for the photo ops but aren't indicative of the real-world.
Personal style is first and foremost personal. It requires taste, self-knowledge, and a budget. This may seem like a high qualification, but when a woman has thoughtfully chosen her clothes, when she really cherishes them, it shows. She's the one who's always put together, without seeming effort, and without, necessarily, expense. I like to think of a maxim of mine, "My clothes don't necessarily match each other, but they match me." And indeed, when that happens, the outfit just works.
To me, this is simply the greatest idea ever. It combines minimalism with aesthetic fastidiousness. Only the very wealthy can afford to buy out a designer, but six or so pieces are a whole 'nother story. And when you have a limited number to answer to, you make sure what you buy is something you love, and something you'll wear... it's a good way to avoid thoughtless purchases (which is not the same as impulse purchases). It improves your cost-per-wear. And it spreads out your purchases over time, so that seasonality doesn't become too limiting. And it's always with your preexisting wardrobe in mind.
As for me, my style is something like boho chic. I like colors and patterns, but often in classic cuts and styles. It's very feminine, the way I dress. I don't mind a little bit of kitsch, and I certainly don't mind the ornate, but it has to be done with sophistication, I think, or it can't be done at all. In any case, I don't really dress like a hippie, and I don't really dress like a lady-who-lunches. It's a mixture of both.
I am not an impulsive buyer, but an obsessive one. As a minimalist in the realm of cosmetics, it only follows that I am also a minimalist when it comes to clothes. And likewise, I have no qualms about expense. I figure, if I'm only buying five to seven pieces, or whatever, I can afford to get the best. I am, after all, of the mindset that everything I buy should be for a lifetime. Still, I can't afford it as such, so this is all wishlist material and castles-in-the-air, at best. But I enjoy my fantasies, even if they are, at that, mere fantasies.
In any case, it's really so much less about what you wear as how you wear it. Confidence is clutch. This is true for a lot of reasons. It's more interesting to see clothes that people wear because it reflects their personality, rather than what 'looks good' or what 'other people will like'. It takes a certain insouciance and bravado to do that. I don't mean that anyone should be combative with clothes—it's a form of expression, not a weapon—but it's always good to see individuals, rather than hordes of trend-followers. It doesn't matter *what* it is, as long it matches who you are. Plus, it also requires a certain level of intelligence, say, or self-knowledge. You've got to know who you are to dress who you are, right?
Nobody's body is perfect, but people will believe you are beautiful if you keep a little mystery. Confidence, again. If your dress, carriage, and manners convey confidence, then people will believe it (whatever it is that you're conveying). Dress your assets as proudly but as unselfconsciously as you can, and nevermind your flaws! Of course, I don't mean an open display of anything—that's not mysterious! But you should never act like you are ashamed of anything. It's your body, it's part of who you are, why should you apologize to society for not fitting into one stereotype or another? Now, that's sexy.
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