A place where I will put stuff that doesn't neatly fit into any other catagories and where I will do my best to keep bad spelling and typos down to a bare minimum. :)
Friday, August 29, 2003
posted by Carol at
2:13 PM (Pacific)
A house.
The house.
Our house.
A home of our own. Our house of belonging.
I almost dare not believe it. I almost can not believe this is really happening, this is really going to happen. It almost doesn't seem real.
This is a big thing in my life, people. This is a thing I never thought I would see for a very long time.
We had our own home once. We lost it. We went bankrupt several years ago.
There. I said it out loud for all the world to see.
It is something I am so ashamed of.
It was an awful, awful time in our lives. It was a horrible thing to have to do. We hated it, but we did it.
Those few years just before and just afterward almost destroyed us, our family, me. Its not something I like to think about, let alone talk or write about.
Bankruptcy was not a decision we made easily or lightly. It was our last resort. We did not do it flippantly. It was not easy. It cost us a great deal.
I was sitting in the bleachers once, at my childrens field day. We had filed in the winter and it was now the end of the school year. As I sat and watched the childrens games I heard the men behind me have a conversation about the unfairness of bankruptcy. A fellow they knew had filed, rid himself of all his debt and was still able to keep his very expensive house. It wasn't fair, he didn't have to pay his bills, he got off scott-free. Its too easy, they said. We'll be the ones paying for it in the long run, another said.
We've worked hard these past years. We've learned our lessons, suffered the consequences. Picked ourselves up and put it all back together. Now we're only a few weeks away from owning our own home once again. Once we do, I'll finally feel respectable again.
Tuesday, August 26, 2003
posted by Carol at
5:58 PM (Pacific)
WE GOT THE HOUSE!!!!
We move in one month.
Remind me to breathe!
Monday, August 25, 2003
posted by Carol at
10:07 PM (Pacific)
OMG.
OMG.
We put a bid on a house tonight.
I'm dying here. We'll know by 6pm tomarrow if it was accepted or not.
Its perfect. Just perfect. Its got a garden, a clothesline and an apple tree.
Its just a small starter home, a ranch. 3 bedrooms, one bath. The basement is HUGE and finished into another bedroom and a family room. Its a few miles outside of town in a small, quiet, well-kept subdivision. There is one house to the north of it and then its cornfield. Its nothing fancy, but the price is incredible.
I'm never going to sleep tonight. Never.
Cross your fingers, say a prayer, send good vibes or think positive thought for us.
I'll keep ya posted.
Saturday, August 23, 2003
posted by Carol at
7:55 PM (Pacific)
Yeah, see it says 5:55 and its actually 7:55 here at home.
Homicide!
I'd forgotten about that one. I loved that show! I was so disappointed when it went off the air. Better for it to go off whilst it was still good than degrade into a crappy soap opera like ER did. The first year and a half, maybe two years of ER was incredible. Then it went to the dogs.
Law and Order is still ok. I prefer the older episodes though.
When I was little I was SO into CHIPS. What was that actors name?....Erik Estrada! He turned up on one of my soap operas a few years ago. He'd aged pretty well. Gained a little weight but was still a handsome man.
Theres this Ford Truck commercial that has Toby Keith in it. I dig Toby Keith and his music. He's in a cop uniform in the end of it and I have to go hose myself down after I see it. *mercy!*
My dream job would be to work as a dispatcher. I keep an eye on the website where they post openings. If they ever have an opening I am THERE.
I noticed the time of my posts is wayyy off. I think its 3 or 4 hours behind whatever time it is here where I am.
Friday, August 22, 2003
posted by Carol at
7:48 PM (Pacific)
YES!
We just got word of pre-approval for our mortgage!
This is really going to happen! Its so hard for me to believe that we are actually going to do it this time. We've got 5 or 6 houses lined up to look at monday afternoon. All but one are brand new, kewl! Never, ever, ever, ever, ever did I dream of being able to own a brand new home.
And, Yes Josie, I see the difference in finding a realtor you like. Night and day difference. I hit it off with this lady almost immediately. When she first pulled up, I must admit I was prepared not to like her. She was driving a Jag. Oh boy. Then she gets out and she's wearing a Ralph Lauren top. I figured she was going to be to "above" us. I was SO wrong. Like I said, we're both mothers of 3 boys that alone levels the playing field some. She was acting kinda ditzy and un-organized which raised my eyebrows abit until she explained that had only just found out their son had been shipped out. How can you not do business with a military mom? Its the women like her that truely deserve awards for serving their country. It was heart wrenching to hear her talk about what she goes through. Anyways, I'm getting off track here. We like her, she likes us and she's positive we can find a home.
Its friday night. DH and Littlest went off to watch the first highschool football game of the season. Its hard to believe football season is already here. Summer seems to never have really gotten started and now its over. Middlest and Biggest are playing Xbox games and here I sit blogging away. Blogging, thats a new verb. Kinda like Lemming. Did we always turn nouns into verbs or is this just another internet phenomenon? How did we get along before the internet? I can't even remember. I think my house was alot cleaner then.
Friday night.
I would not ever be caught home on a friday night. Oh the shame and the horror of not having anywhere to go or anything to do on a friday night.
Lordy, at exactly what moment was it when I began to turn into my mother?
Saturday nights used to be even bigger than friday nights. Now I never go anywhere on saturday evenings. Want to know why?
Cops.
Nonono, not real cops, the TV show Cops. That is one of two TV shows I watch religiously. Whats the other? I'm sure my dear readers are burning with that question.
Judge Judy.
But back to Cops. Saturday night is my Cops night, actually its Cops and cops. After I watch the television show I immediately turn on our scanner and listen in on the real-life version. I've been known to stay up till 1am or later if things get interesting.
Yes, I am a dork and I am ok with that.
I'm sure my being the daughter of a retired police officer has something to do with my cop fetish. When I was little we didn't have such new fangled things as cable tv or the internet but we did have an old scanner that my mother would listen to and then worry herself sick over what my dad was out there doing.
When we get our house we're going to get a king sized bed for DH and me and a dog. My and the kiddos all want a dog.
We went looking at more houses yesterday afternoon. One was an huge old home. I think it was built in the early 1900's, 1920 maybe? I adore old homes. This one was in beautiful shape. 4 bedrooms, 2 full baths, sliding pocket doors with beautiful glass, a huge 3 seasons porch, main level laundry, big fenced yard. Its in a nice itty-bitty town pop. 600 or so. We all liked it but we don't think its "the one".
We'll know it when we find it. We'll walk in the door and it will take our breath away and we'll all say "oooooooooo, this is it." Thats what happened when we found this place. We just KNEW this was it.
We also looked at a home that was still under construction. DH is really leaning towards buying a brand-new home. I never would have dreamed we could even consider buying a brand new house. That would be cool too.
We did find a realtor we like and are going to work with. She has 3 boys. Hers are bigger-23,18 and 17. Her eldest son is in the army and she had just found out the night before that he had shipped out to Iraq 9 days ago. They had no idea. He had just gotten back from Afghanistan 5 months ago. We talked for a long time outside one of the houses
Wednesday, August 20, 2003
posted by Carol at
9:38 PM (Pacific)
I hate realtors.
*humph*
All I want them to do is let me in the house, I don't need all the blah, blah, blah that goes along with it. I don't like being called by my first name 2 seconds after I meet someone. I don't like being pumped for all my info. All I want to do is look at the da*n house. I don't need to be told it has a fireplace (duh, i see it in the living room) and hardwood floors (duh, I'm WALKING on them.) You don't need to know where I live, who our banker is, how much we've been approved for, what am I looking for in a house, blah, blah blah.
Open the door, let me in, let me look, let me leave, if I like it I'll call you. You don't need my home phone number, you have no need to call me. We can find the house we want on our own, we don't need you "looking" for us. Just a key, thats all you are to me, a front door key.
Tuesday, August 19, 2003
posted by Carol at
6:03 PM (Pacific)
Two tidbits of good news to publish.
1. We are going to be able to buy our own home! HURRAY!!! I don't know how much longer this dump we're renting is going to stay standing. I'm really, really, really, really, really hoping we're in our own home by christmas time.
2. MIL drove her brand-spankin'-new car home from the dealer yesterday. She bought a Chevy Malibu, metallic red. Ohhh, is it pretty. It is everything she wanted, price included.
She was so happy and we were so happy for her.
That undercurrent of sadness, of the inevitable, is still there though. I can feel it, I can see it in all of our faces. We all know it but of it we do not speak.
I could be wrong, I HOPE I'm wrong. The doctor flat out told her a few weeks ago that she should have been dead by now. I keep thinking of all of the stats I've read on her cancer, though. 98% of patients are dead within a year of diagnosis. The first doctor told her 6 months. That was 9 months ago. Who knows? Maybe she'll beat it. We're all terminal in the end.
Oooooo, kids have Ferris Bueller's Day Off movie on. I do so love that movie. Matthew Broderick has not aged abit since doing it either.
"I don't believe in -isms I just believe in me."
"When Cameron was in Egyptsland, let my Cameron gooooooooo."
Reading through all of my past posts would lead one to believe I have a serious Star Wars fetish.
I don't, no really, I DON'T.
My offspring do.
I'm the lone female in this house full of boys. It affects me, it even spills over into my blogs. I have a husband and 3 teen/pre-teen boys. The walls are starting to grow hair from all this testosterone.
Monday, August 18, 2003
posted by Carol at
8:59 PM (Pacific)
Putting the kids to bed last night and Littlest comes up with this question.
"If the characters in Star Wars drove cars, what kind of cars would they drive?"
This being the excellent question that it was, we all put our collective heads together and came up with these:
Darth Vader-black iroc z-28
Princess Lea- white corvette, a vintage one probably from the '70's
Yoda- green vw bug
Han- a HUGE Dodge Ram, probably black
Chewbacca- Humvee
OB1(Ben)- Lexus, Littlest and I said brown but Biggest said blue
R2D2 and C3PO- white Miatta. R2 driving and 3PO in the passenger seat.
None of us could come up with what car Luke would drive. Maybe a jeep or a small SUV?
Wait a minute, Yoda isn't in the original star wars movie is he? He doesn't come along until the 2nd, errrrr 5th, movie.
Would you believe I found out from my dad that I actually do have a french ancestor or two? Its from my paternal grandfathers mothers side or my dad's dad's mom. What is that? My great-grandmother. He told me the name too but, for the life of me, i cannot remember what it was. It sounded properly french though.
Who knew?
Friday, August 15, 2003
posted by Carol at
11:42 AM (Pacific)
I am currently reading this book-
"Entre Nous: A Woman's Guide to Finding Her Inner French Gal"
I've suddenly developed an interest in all things French. Even the husband noticed this new fascination of mine and asked what was up. I didn't have an answer right away for him but I did spend some time thinking about it. It was an odd thing for me to be interested in and quite out of character for me. I mean, Indiana Farm Wife is about as far from French Woman as one can be. I think I figured it out. Several months ago a friend of mine asked me if I was french. WTF? I actually snorted in her face, it was such an odd thing to ask me. We had been talking about our religions, ethnicity, backgrounds and family history. She had actually thought it possible that I was of french heritage. Crazy.
I'm just an american mutt. 50% Slovak (my mom's family is PUUUUURE Slovakian.) My dads side is an interesting mix of German, Irish, Welsh and Native American (Cherokee, to be exact but its really, really dilute. I think we counted back and I'm 1/32 Cherokee.)
Maybe I was a french woman in some other life.
Who knows?
Thursday, August 14, 2003
posted by Carol at
1:56 PM (Pacific)
Why is it when I sit down to write at my computer my kids decide to go nuts?
They will be perfect little angels all the live long day until I sit down and try to do some Blogging then all bloody h*ll breaks loose. I bribed them with the X-box just now. I am SUCH a horrid mother. X-box time is very limited for them. Its supposed to be anyway. Its horribly hot and humid here today. I want to ramble abit on here and the kids are bored, hot and going crazy. Soooooooo, I let them take the XBox upstairs and turn on the airconditioner. They're happy, I'm happy. Guilty, but happy. Really the Box is only supposed to be on Friday evenings, Saturdays, and Sundays.
I realized a few things at my class reunion this weekend.
1. People never really change. Ohhhh, we all got older, wiser, fatter, balder but it was still high school all over again. Same cliques, different decade. Different century actually.
2. I have a good life. I have a great life and I am very happy with it.
I already knew this, kinda. It took going to the reunion and seeing all the single moms. People on their 2nd or 3rd marriages, 2nd or 3rd divorces, people now in their 30's and never been married. People hanging out in the bar, smoking, still lookin' for love or lookin' for it again.
I've been married 15 years to a great guy. Oh, we won the award for being married the longest. Actually, there were 4 couples that had gotten married right out of high school. We were one of them and all of us are still together. None of the other couples were there that night so we won by default. I was pretty impressed that there were that many and that we were all still together. I have a great man, a great marriage, and 3 awesome kids. I'm just so lucky and have been so blessed.
~carol m.
Tuesday, August 12, 2003
posted by Carol at
9:10 AM (Pacific)
I ought to change my blog name, its so incredibly long. Its the perfect name for this place though, exactly what it is that I type here. I like the term "Brain Farts", that would work too, but its nowhere near as descriptive or poetic.
Did you know that Jedi-ism is an actual religion? Well, I don't know if one would call it an "actual religion" but a group of people have gotten together and pledged to live their lives in accordance to the Jedi Code. Jedi, as in Star Wars, George Lucas Jedi. I was a total Star Wars nut when I was growing up. I was 7, I think, when the first movie came out and I fell head-over-heels in love with it. I spent practically my entire elementary school year playing "Star Wars" during recess. Now, my offspring are almost as big of fans of it as I was/am. Soooooooo, Jedi-ism isn't as strange of thing to me as it might be to non-starwars lovers. Although, it still is more than a little kooky. If Star Trek can have all those weird Trekky fans than Star Wars ought to be allowed Jedi-ism or -ers.
I went to my 15th class reunion this weekend. High school reunion, that is.
I am glad that I went, I didn't go to my 5th and we didn't have a 10th.
I will eventually have alot to write about, but right now I can't. I only just today picked up my journal to try and process all that happened and what I actually think about it.
It didn't help that I was nursing a horrid hangover all day Sunday *ahem*
My brain is probably just now un-pickling.
Friday, August 08, 2003
posted by Carol at
3:22 PM (Pacific)
Not bad, it looks pretty good,
Even if it says "posted by Josephine".
hehe, thats funny.
I should rename it too. That'll be my next project.
My DH went with my MIL to buy her a car this afternoon. It took me awhile to understand why she (who has terminal pancreatic cancer) wants to buy a brand new car. At first, I thought she was just in denial about the seriousness of her illness, and I do still think that is a small part of this. Terminal people don't buy new cars, don't take on such things as a 5 year car loan. There is more to it than just that though. My MIL hasn't had the easiest of lives. Shes never had much money and she's NEVER EVER been one to splurge on anything at all. She's also never in her life had a brand new car. Now, she will. I'm really glad for her to get it for herself too. She wants a red one and I hope she comes home with one tonight.
Alright then.
Lets see how this looks and if it works.
I wanted a personal blog so I had a place to put my random thoughts of nothingness.
Now, I'm going to hit the post and publish button and go see how the puppy looks.
